I recently released a video about a practice that had such a profound impact healing my relationship around the physical appearance of my vagina. It was called The Witness Me practice and can basically be summed up as a Show And Tell kinda thing with your trusted partner. It’s incredibly powerful and you can check it out here if you haven’t seen it yet.
After the release of that video, my inbox was flooded with emails from awesome women around the world telling me that they too have a few hurdles or barriers around appreciating the physical appearance of their lady cave.
Which is why today I want to share with you another freaking powerful practice that doesn’t involve a partner, can be done anywhere, anytime and has great results.
The Yoni Selfie!
( Don’t know what a Yoni is? It’s a Sanskrit word meaning: sacred place aka your vagina. Personally I dig the word, it reminds me of how special she really is)
Now some of you may have heard of the old: take out the mirror, stick it between your legs and look practice. It’s a good idea and it’s helpful, but does it have long term results?
No. And here’s why…
Five minutes looking at your vagina, trying to fake being comfortable with her will not undo years of non-serving (and sometimes unconscious beliefs) such as; My vagina is ugly. She is dirty. It’s too rude. I’m not the same as I use to be down there. I’m too big, small, lopsided, hairy, not hairy enough etc
Those beliefs directly impact the way we express and celebrate our sexuality. They affect our orgasm, our self-worth, our ability to heal. That shitty voice that tells you your vagina is embarrassing, while your partner is going down on you is robbing you of the full joy and spectrum of your own pleasure and love.
Sometimes these beliefs will show as tightness, pain and numbness in your vagina. It can manifest in the ability to only feel sexually comfortable when the lights are out, or after 22 cocktails. Or it can simply simmer in the back of your mind as a little reminder each time you’re trying to enjoy sexy times (either with yourself or with a partner) that you are not good enough just as you are.
So for all my ladies who feel a little less than groovy about their “bit’s” let’s shut that shit down right now!
And here’s how we’re going do it:
Get out your phone.
Take a photo of your vagina
Look at it every. single. day.
To truly get comfortable with something you need to spend time with it. You need to connect to it. You need to value it. You need to push past the fear and whatever else comes up for you and face it.
So here’s what may or may not happen for you when you do this practice.
You’ll read this and hopefully think…well, yeah I could work on having a better relationship to my vagina, pussy, yoni, etc, I’ll give it a shot…
Then you’ll take the photo.
You’ll look at it and you’ll laugh, you might even cry. But I’m guessing the majority of us aren’t thinking of framing that picture anytime soon. You may even think She is ugly, that your vagina looks weird or wrong. You might get angry.
Great Stuff. You continue to look at the photo every day anyway.
In a weeks time, the shock factor has worn off and you have become a little more neutral about the whole thing. Maybe looking at the photo of your vagina has become like looking at a photo of say… your hand.
Then another week follows. You’re still looking at your sexy selfie each day and suddenly you think
Holy shit. My vagina is beautiful!!!
Bingo. Welcome home, Baby!
Now your in a place where the magic really starts to happen. You begin to appreciate her. You begin to change the way you speak, think, treat her. You look at her with awe, with reverence. You begin to feel connected to her.
Maybe you give her a name, one that reflects her beauty. Perhaps you use affirmations with her, telling her she’s gorgeous and powerful. Maybe you no longer worry what your partners thinking when he is hanging out down town.
Whatever happens, you have taken her out of the shadow and elevated her to a place of importance. Just by doing that, I promise you, she is going to pay you back big time!
So give it a go. Tonight (or right now) go and snap that sexy selfie. Look at it every single day until you feel the transition from Meh to Whatever to Wow!
It may take a few days, weeks or months but stick with it. Keep looking at it. Keeping letting her become a real and important part of you.
Here is a link to an app that will help keep your happy snap safe from prying eyes!
So much love your way!
Tara x
